There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize