I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
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