people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
we're so committed to being not committed
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
