You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
