I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
