i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
