The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
