Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Randomize
