oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I don't deserve a penis
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
