I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
