I wannas sexs uuuuu
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
