The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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