What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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