i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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