Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
