So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
