Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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