I'm drive I can fine osifer
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
