My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
