i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Randomize
