do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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