Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
