I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
