Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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