I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
