He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
