Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
