So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
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