i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
