do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
