You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
