My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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