VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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