About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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