You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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