Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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