Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
