I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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