That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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