I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
