You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
