i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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