talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize