Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
