# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
