I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize