Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
