it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
