what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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