I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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